Seminar Notes: Stacy Westfall on Setting Goals and Overcoming Obstacles

Earlier this afternoon, Stacy Westfall offered a webinar that resonated with my own preoccupation of the month: Setting Goals and Overcoming Obstacles. I glean nuggets from Stacy every time I hear her talk, so I jumped at the chance to attend.
 

Here are my notes:

Stacy started out with the obvious question and answer: Why set a goal? Because, as Zig Ziglar famously said, “If you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time.”

It still rings true, doesn’t it? If we don’t even try to get what we want, we are essentially choosing to live without it.

Then why do people stop trying?

Stacy Westfall on Failure

Stacy observed that the most common reason people stop trying is failure ~ either fear of future failure or the pain of past failure, or both. Sometimes, this fear is so crippling that people give up.

I often wonder if this is what’s really going on with the many people I know who don’t seem to have big dreams, or else never set meaningful goals in the service of their dreams. To me, they seem to coast along with a vague sense of dissatisfaction, muttering about “someday,” but perhaps the experience is more keenly painful than that. Or maybe they’re just less Type A.

Anyway, Stacy suggested that anyone struggling with goal setting take time to explore their past failures. Are those failures getting in the way now? What could you do differently next time?
 

She also encouraged listeners to examine their own thoughts and judgements regarding their failures. A question she asks herself is, “What am I making it mean when something isn’t going as I wish?” The meaning we impose on failure is often more impactful than the failure itself.

Stacy Westfall on Change

Next, Stacy explained that changes is uncomfortable because our brains are hardwired for all things safe and familiar. She noted, “The discomfort of change doesn’t mean I’m off track.”

Change often cuts across our automatic neural pathways, requiring energy and intention from our rational-thinking frontal cortex. Until new habits are really solid, it’s very easy for small diversions (a vacation, an illness, a late alarm clock, a stressful conversation) to skew us back into our default behaviors. 

Sometimes, it helps just to understand what is happening at a physiological level. If nothing else, we might give ourselves a little grace and be in a better frame of mind to try again. We can also anticipate when diversions are imminent and strategize to stay on track.
 

Stacy Westfall on Dreams

Stacy threw out a couple questions to help listeners define their dreams:

  1. What would you attempt if you knew you couldn’t fail?
  2. What would you be willing to fail at every day if you knew you’d eventually win?

Pick your favorite. I gravitate toward #1.

Stacy observed that they are really the same question. Are they? I only partially agree. To me, #1 is more freeing on the dreaming front, while #2 offers a dose of reality that somehow makes the dream itself seem more courageous.

Stacy Westfall on Overcoming Obstacles

Prior to the webinar, Stacy provided a workbook to help listeners plan for overcoming the obstacles that are an inevitable part of goal-seeking. (I believe the workbook is still available for free on her website.)

The idea is to think through potential obstacles as part of the goal-setting process. You can then plan specific strategies for overcoming those obstacles. Of course, unforeseen obstacles will arise and sometimes you will fail. Every time you fail, Stacy advises, identify the obstacle and make a plan to overcome it next time.
 
Each failure, then, leads us to an opportunity. We may need to gain knowledge or build skills, or simply pay more attention to practical ways of planning ahead. “Understanding and accepting failure as part of the journey,” Stacy said, “frees up my mind to be present.”
 

And being present ~ not hung up on the past ~ is key to starting again.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *